Thursday, April 3, 2008

The Thursday Lineup Card: One Liners


It’s the first Thursday Lineup Card for 2008. The major league season is three days old and the minor league season begins today (more or less). Not quite enough baseball to truly ruminate, so let’s set ‘em and knock ‘em down with a few short thoughts and quips.

Groucho Marx: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic and a dyslexic? Someone who stays up all night wondering if there is a Dog.

Color me surprised: ... at the relatively good outings by the Rangers starting pitchers. And yes, I’m including Jason Jennings – Vidro homer aside – loved all the ground balls and I’m willing to give him a pass on his first couple of outings this season since he’s on the rebound from injury/surgery.

Elayne Boosler: My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times, men would not stop and ask for directions.

Don’t blame Jason: Remember the haranguing Jason Botts took on one local blog for leaving runners on base during Spring Training? Can’t blame him for all the runners left on the first three games of this season – Botts has yet to get an AB. Which many of us knew (unfortunately) might happen. Scott Lucas had the best line about it on his Rangers Rundown Blog: http://www.rangers.scottlucas.com/ “Jason Botts won the battle with [Nelson]Cruz and [Kevin]Mench, for which his reward will be encasement in carbonite at the end of Ron Washington’s bench.

Steven Wright: Hermits have no peer pressure

Out of sync: I’ve used this analogy already for comments I’ve written on Micah’s and Jon’s blogs. Good defensive infields are confident, they make the routine plays every time and know each other’s moves like clockwork. I don’t get that feeling watching Blalock-Young-Kinsler-Broussard. Don’t know if it’s the flu, the weather, or the gears just need some realigning. It is kind of peculiar that note that for once, the IF is a bigger worry than the Rangers OF.

James Thurber: Boys are beyond the range of anyone’s sure understanding, at least when they are between the ages of 18 months to 90 years.

Josh Hamilton: He’s pretty good isn’t he?

George Carlin: Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he’ll sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

It’s just three games: Nice start by Trey Hillman’s Kansas City Royals – sweeping the vaunted Tigers in Detroit. Okay, it’s just three games, but Trey’s off to a better start as a new manager than someone we know was last season and even this season.

Henny Youngman: Man goes to a psychiatrist, says “Doc, no-one listens to me!” Doctor says “Next!”

Minor Matters: Mike Hindman has updates on his Rangers Farm Report blog http://rangersfarmreport.mlblogs.com/ including correcting some mis-information on Kasey Kiker. Plus, if you absolutely must know who is pitching in Clinton on Monday night, be sure to bookmark the mysteriously named “Shroom’s” Rangers Farm Probables website http://www.my.calendars.net/farmprobs/ for pitchers, audio links and sly remarks. (“King Fu” quotes always appreciated).

Phyllis Diller: I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Sunday’s will never be the same: As I whined about a few weeks ago, Oklahoma City has moved most of their Sunday games to 7:00 p.m. starting in June – that means only three Sunday afternoon games this season. One of them is on Mother’s Day – do you think I might be able to talk Baseball Mom and Mrs. Schemge into spending Mother’s Day at Bricktown Ballpark? Maybe not... I thought I’d only be able to take one Sunday trip up I-35 this season, however, the baseball gods smiled on me. A personal schedule change means a trip to OKC this Sunday, even if I do have to watch Sir Sidney pitch.

Rodney Dangerfield: My psychiatrist told me I was crazy, and I said I want a second opinion. He said: “Okay, you’re ugly too.”

Finally: Game reports, photo galleries and over hyping prospects return next week – from Oklahoma City, Opening Day at Frisco…oh yeah and that other home opener too.

Yogi Berra: "The future ain't what it used to be "

Yogi, I couldn’t have said it better myself – Marla Hooch

3 comments:

hurlerhurley said...

I was going to try and see Hurley pitch tonight at the Brick but i had to work late. I just got home. Time for a good drink and I now get to relax

I just saw the box to the CWS game and Danks apparently pitched a gem this afternoon. wtg, John!

I like the new blog, hooch.

Craig said...

We are excited ourselves to be going up to OKC to see the Red Hawks play Sunday ourselves. Many of the players on the Oklahoma City roster are the same kids we enjoyed watching play at Frisco the last two years.

It is an exciting time to be a Ranger fan. There is so much to offer from our farm system. To really apprieciate the major league club one must take the oppurtunity to watch the talent in the minor leagues. There is a cetain amount of satisfaction I recieve when I am in Rangers Ballpark in Arlington watching new call ups that I have followed in Frisco and Oklahoma City. I should make it a point to make up to Frisco and Oklahoma City more often.

Micah said...

I read somewhere that if Jason doesn't perform by late May, he will probably be DFA'd. I hope he's behaving himself on the bench...that seems to be the only "performing" he gets to do. GRRRRR. Four games in and he hasn't touched a bat or glove yet.